Kink / Sexual Outsiders

In human sexuality, kinkiness is the use of unconventional sexual practices, concepts or fantasies. Kink plays a positive, healthy role in many people’s sex lives. However, integrating the nuances of kink, fetishes, and power-exchange into a loving, intimate relationship can be a challenge for some couples. Or maybe you want to work on something completely unrelated to your kink? A therapist who is sex-positive and kink-friendly can help you with both in a safe, welcoming and educated environment. Reach out to one of TherapyDen’s kink experts today.

Meet the specialists

Providing competent, compassionate care to individuals and couples who identify as kinky is one of my specialties, and with my training in sex therapy I am confident that I am both kink-knowledgable and kink-affirming. I have years of experience working with couples and relationship groups looking to explore power imbalances, introduce an individual's kink in a safe and appropriate way and learning how to integrate their kinks into their experience of their sexuality.

— Alana Ogilvie, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in Portland, OR
 

I work will all types of sexual behaviors, relationship configurations and non heteronormative expressions. I create a safe, contained space to emotionally and mentally explore your challenges, hopes, and ways to establish a full and healthy sex life and relationship with both yourself and those who you are connected with.

— Adrian Scharfetter, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in Sacramento, CA

While therapy is supposed to be a place of acceptance and non-judgement, when it comes to sex some counselors aren't equipped to lovingly work with the kink community. As a kink-aware professional, I have worked with those in the lifestyle and received advanced training and education in the world of kink, fetish, and sex worker culture. Human sexuality is vibrant and varied - your flavor of expression is unique and valued.

— Katrina Knizek, Counselor in Spokane, WA
 

In counseling, we can discuss healthy relationships, consent, gender and sexuality (both intimacy/sex-wise and affectional/sexual orientation-wise). This will always be done in a judgment-free, kink-aware and poly-friendly setting. You will be accepted fully no matter what your sexual interests are and I am happy to provide education and resources on exploring your inner and outer sex life. **Please note there will be no nudity or physical contact in session.**

— Caitlin Bovard, Sex Therapist in Broomfield, CO

I am a firm believer that people in kink-based relationships often have healthier relationships than "vanilla" people, because so much is based on communication. But even the healthiest of relationships can run into rough patches. My goal is to create a safe space where we can explore what's wrong, and ways to fix it, without you ever feeling condemned for your kink.

— LAKink Shrink, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in West Los Angeles, CA
 

I am familiar with and have been involved in the kink community.

— Heather Bell, Clinical Social Worker in Clackamas, OR

I believe that the range of human sexual expression is infinitely varied and diverse. Every form of expression (or lack of expression) is valid and worthy of exploration. As a member of the BDSM community myself, I have worked hard to bridge the gap between the kink community and the providers that serve them. This has included educational workshops for providers on kink and BDSM, as well as workshops for community members on healthy relationship dynamics and the intersections of mental health.

— Kian Leggett, Associate Clinical Social Worker in Tacoma, WA
 

I have done extensive research and trainings in the BDSM & polyamorous/non-monogamous lifestyles. I have also gone through sex therapy and couples counseling trainings to help provide non-judgmental couples therapy. I am very open and comfortable working with kink friendly and sex positive communities as well as those outrside of these populations.

— Karla Kurtz, Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Everett, WA

I have worked with clients with a wide variety of kinky identities & interests, everything from bondage to various fetishes to power-exchange relationships. I have no problem with educating myself about your kink, though I will ask about how you practice it, rather than assuming information I gathered from a book could encapsulate your play & identity. My passion is helping clients who have had therapists latch onto their outsider status as being THE problem, instead of seeing the whole person.

— Kelley O'Hanlon, Licensed Mental Health Counselor in Redmond, WA
 

Part of my initial training included working with people who self-identify as "sexual outsiders," and this is something that has applied to many of my clients. I am a member of Bay Area Open Minds, an organization for psychotherapists who affirm that sexual and gender diversity are natural expressions of the human experience. I attend panels and presentations as well as kink events.

— Nicole Rennix, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in Napa, CA

BDSM and kink is a lifestyle that adds intentional power exchange (PE) into relationships which explore sexual dominance, submission, fetishism, age-play, and other forms of kink. For some, kinky sex is used to 'spice things up' in the bedroom by adding new activities and toys to their sex life, while others use protocols of dominance and submission to structure their PE relationships. Consent and negotiation are at the heart of this lifestyle. Experience with sex work as well.

— Tammy 'Kaia' Bruski, Licensed Professional Counselor in Denver, CO
 

As a sex therapist, I am sex positive and open to working with those who enjoy "non-traditional" experiences of sexual pleasure (and consensual pain). I will do everything in my power to feed your empowerment and starve your shame. The media and dominate culture already does a good job of feeding shame. I guarantee you that whatever you're into, and whatever you experience, you are more "normal" or "healthy" than you might think.

— Emily Graham, Therapist in Denver, CO

I have over 30 years of experience and knowledge of Kink, BDSM, and other sexual activities and desires. I love to answer questions and educate clients about sex in all its aspects. I will always remember to not "yuck your yum" unless it involves children or non-consensual activities, in which case I must follow my ethics and report if the law mandates.

— Deanna Potts, Clinical Social Worker in Fort Worth, TX
 

While therapy is supposed to be a place of acceptance and non-judgement, when it comes to sex some counselors aren't prepared to lovingly work with the kink community. As a kink-aware professional, I have worked with those in the lifestyle and received advanced training and education in the world of kink, fetish, and sex worker culture. Human sexuality is vibrant and varied - your flavor of expression is unique and valued.

— Katrina Knizek, Counselor in Spokane, WA

Variations in sexuality are part of human nature, but the way our society sees it is highly stigmatized and being involved in the kink and bdsm community can be highly spiritual and gratifying experience. I also work with sex worker communities. Saying that you love sex work is real, and is okay. Kowing the difference, when it is not for enjoyment but for survival is important and okay too.

— MOUSHUMI GHOSE, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in TOLUCA LAKE, CA
 

I've been involved in this community since 2013, and have been working clinically with this population since I was in school. I co-led a "Kink 101" workshop for my classmates to increase their competency on working with this population.

— Julia Koerwer, Social Worker in Brooklyn, NY

All of our therapists have varying level of experience with different communities and experience within kink and BDSM communities, but all of our therapists have competence and an expertise in working with kink and "sexual outsiders" with individuals and partnerships

— Gender & Sexuality Therapy Center, Licensed Clinical Social Worker in new york, NY
 

I provide a safe place for people to come in and share who they are.

— Veronica Ulery, Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Northwood, NH

Sexual desires come in many shapes, sizes, colors and experiences. For those who don't enjoy the traditional model of what some call "vanilla sex," it can feel lonely and isolating to believe that you are 'different.' Well I am here to tell you that there's no need to feel alone! As a certified sex therapist, it is my goal and mission to help you connect with others who have similar sexual desires, and to be able to live out your fantasies shame free.

— Natalie Finegood Goldberg, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in beverly hills, CA
 

Societal expectations around sexuality and relationships often have an impact on us. This is especially true for people who identify as asexual or kinky, or participate in sexual or non-sexual kink. Before being a therapist, I had the privilege to form connections within local and larger kink communities. As a former member of Kink and Poly Aware Chicago Therapists (KPACT), I broadened my knowledge even further through formal clinical training.

— Eric Mills, Counselor in Federal Way, WA

BDSM and kink is a lifestyle that adds intentional power exchange (PE) into relationships which explore sexual dominance, submission, fetishism, age-play, and other forms of kink. For some, kinky sex is used to spice things up in the bedroom by adding new activities and toys to their sex life, while others use protocols of dominance and submission to structure their PE relationships. Consent and negotiation are at the heart of this lifestyle. Substantial experience with sex work as well.

— Tammy 'Kaia' Bruski, Licensed Professional Counselor in Denver, CO

I am comfortable working with relationships of any type or identity and ready to meet you where you are to discuss, with openness, any issues you want to address. If you are experiencing issues within your sex life, I am comfortable discussing any and all aspects that are concerning you. If you are part of the LGBTQIA+ community, involved in a polyamorous relationship, or engaged in BDSM/fetishism, you will find a safe and non-judgmental space to discuss this aspect of your life.

— Crystal Frederick, Counselor in Austin, TX
 

Have you recently discovered that you have some kink fantasies that you want to explore with your partner(s) but are unsure how to bring it up? I pride myself on giving a space for you an your partner(s) to allow expression of relationship issues & exploration while feeling heard by a neutral party (myself) that affirmatively supports issues in this community while also noting that identifying as being part of this community may not have anything to do with your relationship issues.

— Paige Bond, Registered Marriage and Family Therapist Intern in Orlando, FL

Kink positive and familiar to provide a space to navigate challenges within relationships.

— Jeni Yarbrough, Counselor in Los Angeles, CA
 

Every person deserves and meaningful, fulfilling sexual experience that brings them to life, gives them a sense of vitality and connection. We all find different paths to these enriching experiences. I work to empower people to find the ways they prefer and to get the most out of them. Much of this work involves overcoming shame and defeating oppression (internal and external) and bolstering empowerment.

— Matthew LeBauer, Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Denver, CO

I'm not just someone who will tolerate your sexual identity; I have wide-ranging knowledge of BDSM and sex work, strong ties to those communities, and a nuanced perspective on the benefits and pitfalls of those aspects of identity. Ultimately I am not interested in steering you toward or away from any particular way of being, but supporting you in making the best possible decisions for yourself.

— Jessica Gioia, Associate Marriage & Family Therapist in Alameda, CA
 

-Kink & BDSM (D/s, DD/lg, pet play, age play, bondage, power structure, etc.) -Queer, LGBTIQA+, sex-worker friendly

— Olivia Stadler, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in San Francisco, CA