Nonviolent Communication

Nonviolent communication was developed out of a belief that our culture has taught us to think and speak in ways that can actually perpetuate conflict, internal pain and even violence. Nonviolent communication is founded on the tenet that all human beings have the capacity for compassion and only resort to violence or behavior that harms themselves and others when they do not recognize more effective strategies for meeting needs. It is typically taught, often in a therapy session, as a process of interpersonal communication designed to improve compassion for, and connection to, others. Think this approach might be right for you? Reach out to one of TherapyDen’s nonviolent communication specialists today. 

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It can be difficult to explore our inner world when we lack the words and structure necessary to communicate them effectively. For years I have incorporated Nonviolent Communication perspectives of human feelings and needs in order to empower clients to request from others what they need out of their relationships. I developed my approach through training with practitioners and Nonviolent Communication trainers as a part of my graduate studies.

— Dylan Keenberg, Clinical Psychologist in Bellingham, WA

Do you want to resolve conflicts - with yourself and others - in ways that honor your deepest needs? Do you want solutions that work for you and also meet the needs of others? Nonviolent Communication is about how to make that happen. It's about creating the kind of relationship that helps to meet, or at least honor, everyone's needs. It doesn't always get us what we want, but it greatly increases the chances of truly satisfying our underlying needs.

— Carlyle Stewart, Counselor in Asheville, NC
 

NVC is the practice of making an observation, expressing a feeling, then a need and making a request. Using NVC takes the charge out of communication which can be so painful and threatening to the survival of the relationship. It allows people to take ownership of their experience and not direct their feelings towards others, which usually only escalates conflict and leads to breakdowns. Utilizing NVC makes hearing one another much easier by staying calm & cool.

— Annette Barnett, Associate Marriage & Family Therapist in Saratoga, CA

NVC is the practice of making an observation, expressing a feeling, then a need and making a request. Using NVC takes the charge out of communication which can be so painful and threatening to the survival of the relationship. It allows people to take ownership of their experience and not direct their feelings towards others, which usually only escalates conflict and leads to breakdowns. Utilizing NVC makes hearing one another much easier by staying calm & cool.

— Annette Barnett, Associate Marriage & Family Therapist in Saratoga, CA
 

Most of us have been taught to communicate passively, critically, or manipulatively––and that’s so normal to us that we don’t even realize we’re doing it. That is, until we find ourselves feeling powerless to get our needs met, repeating the same conflicts with those we love, and feeling alone or trapped in our relationships. The nonviolent framework provides a systematic approach by teaching us to be present to our own needs, feelings, and requests without blaming others or internalizing shame.

— Alexa Golding, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in Los Angeles, CA

I have found nonviolent communication to be extremely helpful in clearer and more accurate expression. Additionally, the use of nonviolent communication bypasses many of the standard miscommunications and perceived offenses of standard conversation, facilitating information flow without argument. Interestingly, the use of nonviolent communication may also make the speaker appear more charismatic and persuasive.

— Erica Rampelberg, Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor in Delaware, OH

Nonviolent Communication (aka NVC or Compassionate Communication) is a unique and powerful process for inspiring connection and action with others. Communication is the backbone of human relationships, even the relationship with ourselves. As a therapist trained in NVC, I help my clients learn compassionate, clear, communication skills that can contribute to their well-being, empowerment, and connection in every area of their lives.

— Elise Fabricant, Licensed Professional Counselor Candidate in Denver, CO
 

I support clients in practicing the principles of nonviolent communication to help them develop empathy in their conversations and better express their feelings and needs

— Ruth Sze, Associate Marriage & Family Therapist in Manhattan Beach, CA

NVC focuses on developing empathic listening and communication skills and building emotional intelligence and conflict resolution skills. In couples counseling, NVC can help partners learn to communicate more effectively, express their needs and emotions in a non-judgmental way, and create a deeper sense of connection and understanding. Couples can develop greater empathy, compassion, and trust in their relationships by learning to listen and speak from the heart.

— Amanda Smaridge, Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor Associate
 

I have been using NVC since before becoming a therapist. My partner first introduced it to me back in 2016 as a helpful way to relate to children. But as Marshall Rosenberg made clear, its use can serve people of all ages from any background. This is because the emphasis is on understanding someone else's underlying needs, which we all have. In communicating with "I" statements, recognizing ones feelings and values, and requesting help, we avoid blame, evaluation, and demands that alienate us.

— Dani Knoll, Associate Marriage & Family Therapist in , CA

Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is a wonderful technique for helping you connect to your own feelings and needs, and figure out ways to work through conflicts with others in a clear and compassionate way.

— Deborah Ranker, Clinical Social Worker in Portland, OR
 

NVC is foundational to the work I do with clients. I encourage my clients to communicate with themselves and with others from a place of empathy, understanding and openness/flexibility, all while asserting and holding personal boundaries.

— Nanika Coor, Clinical Psychologist in Brooklyn, NY

Understanding the difference between healthy and unhealthy communication coupled with an understanding of domestic violence influences my expertise in this area. I've worked with clients individually as well as in a group setting to teach skills pertaining to good vs bad communication, conflict resolution, communication styles, boundaries and a host of other topics that influence the exchange of communication.

— Chavara Hamilton, Licensed Professional Counselor in Dallas-Fort Worth, TX
 

I utilize non-violent communication with many of my couples to help them communicate in an effective and non-judgemental way. Using non-blaming language helps us to truly hear what our partner is saying and is a great way to find understanding. I have been trained in non-violent communication work through my work at Life Coaching and Therapy and this model has helped many of my couples find relief.

— Melody Atkinson, Associate Marriage & Family Therapist in Hartford, CT

I use Non-violent Communication (NVC) in my life both personally and professionally because it's such a direct way to speak to our feelings and needs while respecting ourselves and the person we're communicating with. I find it's most helpful as a tool when people are just beginning to speak more kindly to themselves and meet their needs. NVC is great for improving your self-talk, not just how you communicate with others!

— Elissa Burdick, Therapist in ,