Nonviolent Communication

NVC is the practice of making an observation, expressing a feeling, then a need and making a request. Using NVC takes the charge out of communication which can be so painful and threatening to the survival of the relationship. It allows people to take ownership of their experience and not direct their feelings towards others, which usually only escalates conflict and leads to breakdowns. Utilizing NVC makes hearing one another much easier by staying calm & cool.

NVC is the practice of making an observation, expressing a feeling, then a need and making a request. Using NVC takes the charge out of communication which can be so painful and threatening to the survival of the relationship. It allows people to take ownership of their experience and not direct their feelings towards others, which usually only escalates conflict and leads to breakdowns. Utilizing NVC makes hearing one another much easier by staying calm & cool.

Most of us have been taught to communicate passively, critically, or manipulatively––and that’s so normal to us that we don’t even realize we’re doing it. That is, until we find ourselves feeling powerless to get our needs met, repeating the same conflicts with those we love, and feeling alone or trapped in our relationships. The nonviolent framework provides a systematic approach by teaching us to be present to our own needs, feelings, and requests without blaming others or internalizing shame.

I have found nonviolent communication to be extremely helpful in clearer and more accurate expression. Additionally, the use of nonviolent communication bypasses many of the standard miscommunications and perceived offenses of standard conversation, facilitating information flow without argument. Interestingly, the use of nonviolent communication may also make the speaker appear more charismatic and persuasive.

Do you want to resolve conflicts - with yourself and others - in ways that honor your deepest needs? Do you want solutions that work for you and also meet the needs of others? Nonviolent Communication is about how to make that happen. It's about creating the kind of relationship that helps to meet, or at least honor, everyone's needs. It doesn't always get us what we want, but it greatly increases the chances of truly satisfying our underlying needs.

I help people to learn the principles of nonviolent communication so as to be able to respectfully assert to one another, as well as to hear feedback non-defensively.

I was introduced to Nonviolent Communication (NVC) about 17 years ago and have been drawing upon the practice ever since. NVC is a way of viewing one's self, one another and the world with empathy--truly listening with an open heart. I am inspired by NVC's stance that humans share common needs. In my work, I listen for those needs; to be understood, to have choice, or be considered, to name a few.

When working on creating better relationships with partners, colleagues, or family members, non-violent communication is essential. I'll introduce the basics, you'll practice, and begin implementing it in your own life.

It can be difficult to explore our inner world when we lack the words and structure necessary to communicate them effectively. For years I have incorporated Nonviolent Communication perspectives of human feelings and needs in order to empower clients to request from others what they need out of their relationships. I developed my approach through training with practitioners and Nonviolent Communication trainers as a part of my graduate studies.

Learning to identify, express, and share our feelings and needs can change both how we relate to ourselves and to others. When we don't know how we are feeling, how can someone comfort or reassure us? Together we find a way for you to not only know what you feel and need but also to trust in yourself enough to ask for it from your family, partner, and the world.

Often we struggle within our relationships due to a lack of understanding of how to communicate. Nonviolent communication gives us a good framework to learn the art of communication.

I have 10+ years of practice with NVC. It has shaped how I think and interact in my personal life as well as how I understand clients.

If you have struggles communicating with your family, friends, spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend, boss, teacher, neighbor, etc. you will benefit from learning nonviolent communication (NVC). NVC is being used around the world to aid in communication and to decrease conflict. NVC is composed of four parts: observations, feelings, needs, requests. When you focus on your own experience, the receiver hears the message without blame or criticism (and are less likely to become defensive).

NVC teaches us to understand and know what our needs and feelings are. I come back again and again to this practice with clients, no matter the circumstance.