Dan Bierman (He/him)

Being a parent informs everything I say or do as a clinician, and it makes me particularly conscious of the reparenting function of the therapist. I understand that our parenting is often a reaction – positive or negative – to how we were raised. I will help you understand what your parent may have been thinking when they did something you experienced as challenging, cruel, or otherwise inexplicable. And, when it comes to your own children, I will help you sort out your own motivations.

My goal in couples therapy is to increase understanding. This starts with communication, and I encourage you to share with your partner the effects your partner's words/actions have on you. I also try to help you understand the root causes of your feelings and behaviors. Doing so in couples therapy allows both partners to better understand why the other does/says the things they do. At this point, partners increase their empathy toward each other, which, in turn, makes each feel more loved.

Being a parent informs everything I say or do as a clinician, and it makes me particularly conscious of the reparenting function of the therapist. I understand that our parenting is often a reaction – positive or negative – to how we were raised. I will help you understand what your parent may have been thinking when they did something you experienced as challenging, cruel, or otherwise inexplicable. And, when it comes to your own children, I will help you sort out your own motivations.

Being a parent informs everything I say or do as a clinician, and it makes me particularly conscious of the reparenting function of the therapist. I understand that our parenting is often a reaction – positive or negative – to how we were raised. I will help you understand what your parent may have been thinking when they did something you experienced as challenging, cruel, or otherwise inexplicable. And, when it comes to your own children, I will help you sort out your own motivations.

Being a parent informs everything I say or do as a clinician, and it makes me particularly conscious of the reparenting function of the therapist. I understand that our parenting is often a reaction – positive or negative – to how we were raised. I will help you understand what your parent may have been thinking when they did something you experienced as challenging, cruel, or otherwise inexplicable. And, when it comes to your own children, I will help you sort out your own motivations.

Many of us have grown up in an atmosphere of “stoic masculinity,” in which fathers are not demonstrative of their love or their other “softer” emotions. This leaves us without a masculine role model for how to access, feel, and express our emotions in a balanced way. In addition, in our zeal to “fix” things, we often fail to provide enough empathy for the people we love. I will help you on your journey to becoming the loving, sensitive, caring man you -- and your loved ones -- want.

Being a parent informs everything I say or do as a clinician, and it makes me particularly conscious of the reparenting function of the therapist. I understand that our parenting is often a reaction – positive or negative – to how we were raised. I will help you understand what your parent may have been thinking when they did something you experienced as challenging, cruel, or otherwise inexplicable. And, when it comes to your own children, I will help you sort out your own motivations.

Being a parent informs everything I say or do as a clinician, and it makes me particularly conscious of the reparenting function of the therapist. I understand that our parenting is often a reaction – positive or negative – to how we were raised. I will help you understand what your parent may have been thinking when they did something you experienced as challenging, cruel, or otherwise inexplicable. And, when it comes to your own children, I will help you sort out your own motivations.

Being a parent informs everything I say or do as a clinician, and it makes me particularly conscious of the "re-parenting" function of the therapist. I understand that our parenting is often a reaction – positive or negative – to how we were raised. I will help you understand what your parent may have been thinking when they did something you experienced as challenging, cruel, or inexplicable. And, when it comes to your own children, I will help you sort out your own motivations.

I believe that, because some of our core psychological wounding comes from our often fraught relationship with our parents, the quality of the therapeutic relationship is the most important determinant of success in therapy. The laboratory of the therapy room is designed to help you experience the kind of relationship you may not have had in your family of origin. Armed with this experience, you will then be able to expect and practice this kind of relationship in the rest of your life.

As a firm believer in cause and effect, I try to help clients know that their feelings and behaviors have causes and context and are understandable, so that they can view themselves not as misfits, but rather as people responding naturally and as best able to sub-optimal situations. Once you begin to understand the reasons behind your own behaviors, in particular the ones holding you back, you will be both better able to control them and more tolerant of those moments when you can't.

Life is full of decisions, and, to varying degrees, we all struggle to make them. While I do possess a great deal of life experience my goal is not to give you advice, but to help you organize and streamline your decision-making approach. In this vein, I will raise the questions that you should be asking yourself to help identify the conflict that is keeping you stuck. My goal is for you to have greater confidence in your process and, thus, greater confidence in your ultimate decisions.