“Swoon” Show Notes: Episode #73 – Don't Worry Be Happy: When Your Partner has Anxiety

Jeff Guenther, MS, LPC on Aug 02, 2020 in swoon

Anxiety, stress and worry are common experiences, especially during a pandemic. This week on Swoon, Gina and Julie talk about how to best support your partner when they struggle with anxiety

This episode covers:

  • Understanding anxiety and how it might show up in your relationship.
  • Clues that you or your partner may be anxious.
  • Unhealthy coping mechanisms for anxiety.
  • Tools to help with anxiety or worry.

        Memorable Quotes

        “We all experience anxiety or stress or worry at different times.”

        “Sometimes the things we look at as weird behaviors may actually be giving someone comfort.”

        “With anxiety, the more we try to ignore it or resist it the bigger it gets.”

        “Not all stress is bad. Sometimes a little stress or anxiety serves us.”

        “Sometimes anxiety shows up in a clinginess or over functioning.”

        “With BDSM, a lot of folks who experience anxiety find it's a nice outlet because it is controlled and boundaried with a lot of predictability you can build in.”

        “I want to normalize that it's Ok to take meds.”

        “Anxiety is a way that we relate to uncertainty or existential dread and I don't know if you've noticed but we are living in a pandemic right now. People's existential dread and worry is way up.”

        “It's tricky right now to know what is situational and what is more chronic.”

        “It can feel like a lot to be living with anxiety and it can also be a lot to be living with someone who is living with anxiety.”

        “There's all sorts of things you can practice, but they only work if you practice them.”

        “It's not codependent to get support from someone and have them help you use your tools. If you are expecting them to save you and not do any of the work on your own, that's a different story.”

          Resources from the Podcast

          Swoon Episode - Paint it Black: When your partner is depressed

          Action Steps

          Questions to explore with partner

          • When and how does a touch of anxiety affect me and what are the things I need?
          • How will I know when you need support?
          • What are the tools that help when you feel anxious?

          Get support

          Looking for coaching? Connect with Gina

          Looking for a therapist in Oregon? Connect with Julie

          Looking for other therapeutic support? Check out TherapyDen

          Your Swoon hosts

          Gina Senarighi, MS, MA, CPC is a sexuality counselor and communication consultant specializing in healthy boundaries, passionate relationships, jealousy, and infidelity. She supports non-traditional couples all over the world as a retreat leader and certified relationship coach.
          Connect with Gina

          Julie Jeske, LPC is a sex and relationship counselor. She has a private practice where she helps clients increase intimacy, ignite passion and deepen their connection to themselves and others. Julie especially loves to help women discover who they are sexually. Through counseling, online classes, or in-person retreats; her clients learn how to talk about their sexual and relationship desires, and explore ways to make them a reality.
          Connect with Julie

          Jeff Guenther is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Portland, OR.
          Website

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