Services
About My Clients
Something keeps coming back around. The same fight, the same reaction, the same stuck place you thought you’d worked through. Maybe it’s between you and your partner. Maybe it’s between you and the version of yourself that keeps showing up when you’d rather it not. From the outside, things might look fine. Careers are working, the relationship is stable, the life you’ve built is one you worked hard for. Privately, something has shifted, and you’ve been carrying it quietly.
My Background and Approach
I work with couples and individuals on the patterns that keep running, in the relationship and in the self. High conflict is welcome. Long-standing patterns are welcome. The parts of you that have been hard to bring anywhere else are welcome. My style is direct and I don’t flinch, which is often what people are actually looking for. We slow down enough to see what’s happening in real time, learn how it works well enough to step out of it on purpose, and build something steadier. I draw from EFT, Gottman, IFS, and EMDR within a trauma-informed frame, though in session this looks less like applied protocol and more like meeting what’s actually in the room. Before becoming a therapist I spent two decades in Bay Area real estate, working with people through some of the harder transitions of their lives. That taught me to sit with what’s complicated, listen for what’s underneath, and take what people have built seriously.
My Personal Beliefs and Interests
I work with what’s been protecting you, not against it. Withdrawal, over-functioning, bracing, people-pleasing, the quiet decision long ago to stop asking for certain things. These were your nervous system’s best available answers to environments that asked something of you, often early. They loosen when they’re met, not when they’re pushed. My job isn’t to steer you toward an answer or to turn your partner into the problem. It’s to help you get clear enough that the answer becomes yours. I trust the part of you that already knows more than you’ve let yourself say out loud, and I notice the moments you try to walk it back. The work tends to move slowly in some places and quickly in others, in whatever order your system can actually hold. Insight is useful but it isn’t the thing that changes anything on its own. What changes things is being met somewhere underneath the thinking, in the place the pattern actually lives.