About My Clients
Please visit my site, https://seattle-counseling.com. About 85% of my clients are erotic, sexual, gender and/or relational minorities. About 25% of them are people of color and/or ethnic minorities. Erotic, sexual, gender, racial, ethnic and relationally diverse clients experience multiple levels of minority stress. Their kinky and/or non-monogamous lives are at various levels of self-validation and ownership. I support every client who sees these parts of themselves as being growth-oriented.
My Background and Approach
I began building my approach to relational psychotherapy twenty-three years ago. The practice model I use with relationships integrates partner sexualities into treatment. Regardless of who I work with, I use my understanding of the lifelong process of differentiation. It lies at the heart of personal development – having a self and fulfilling relationships with others. It’s also non-normative – ideal for clinical work with kinky and non-monogamous clients. Differentiation elegantly models the process of evolving and maturing, and finding a clear sense of self. It’s partly about developing immunity (self-soothing) to adult-level anxiety, allowing people to balance their feelings and thinking enough to nourish relationships. I continuously use a developmental perspective. It’s about how people, families (including chosen) and relationships take their shape over time.
My Personal Beliefs and Interests
Seeing adults as constantly growing (especially in relationships) creates productive therapy far better than an emphasis on what’s wrong or pathologic. Like other healthcare professionals, psychotherapists must be competent or proficient with clients from family origins, cultures and life experiences that are very different than their own. (Clinical Social Work Code of Ethics, Section 5) The core of bias & prejudice is how we perceive people as Others: unknown, unequal, mistrusted stereotypes. A psychotherapy practice must be a safe harbor from the stifling effects of privilege, which by its nature bypasses and suppresses open dialogue and growth. I will always be learning how to communicate more directly about race, culture, sexuality, gender, relational choices, nationality, health status, socio-economics, and more. It means acknowledging and examining errors and inherent bias, even those that have negative effects on mental, medical and social health.