Penelope (Nel) Mercer (she/they)

I have both professional training and personal experience to inform my work with LGBTQ folks. Aspects of this may include processing identity shifts, examining internalized bias, and discovering the strengths associated with being outside of the mainstream. Working with LGBTQ folks encourages me to fight oppression on many different levels.

Many of my clients are exploring their gender identity and/or considering transition. I also work with the parents and siblings of trans and non-binary individuals, supporting them as they come to terms with their own feelings and discover new strengths and insights associated with gender exploration and transition.

I bring my professional and lived experience to support clients who are navigating the challenges and exceptional growth opportunities of open relationships (including polyamory, consensual non-monogamy, ethical non-monogamy, and the Lifestyle). Common topics including determining the structure of an open relationship and working through attachment-related issues such as jealousy.

Trauma results from deeply-disturbing or distressing events that overwhelm our ability to cope, leading to feelings of helplessness, overwhelm and/or detachment from self and others. Understanding how trauma shows up in our bodies and minds helps us to heal and live in the present, rather than trapped in the past. Trauma-informed therapy involves experiencing safety in connection, promoting self-regulation, empowerment, and healing. Brainspotting can be a powerful tool in trauma therapy.

Parts work acknowledges the many different parts or aspects of our minds and personalities. Different parts have different needs, wants, beliefs, and strengths which tend to both help and hinder us. Parts work emphasizes self-compassion and acceptance: There are "no bad parts" and "all parts are welcome" in the Internal Family Systems model. By bringing awareness and acceptance to each of our parts, we foster integration, which leads to greater flexibility and choice in our lives.

Research shows that the attachment bonds we create with others affect every aspect of our physical and mental health “from the cradle to the grave” (Bowlby, 1979, p.129). Furthermore, we know that attachment styles are malleable and that attachment injuries may be healed. I seek to help you foster secure, healthy attachment with your significant others and, ultimately, with yourself. Specifically, I'm trained in Emotionally Focused Therapy (and Emotionally Focused Family Therapy).