Molly Toomey (they/them)

Relational trauma is a type of trauma that happens in the context of a relationship, such as abuse or neglect earlier in life, or being chronically let down or not attuned to. Healing from this happens through repeat experiences of safer, healthier, more secure attachment and connection—and our therapeutic relationship provides this by creating a safer space to test-drive and experience new ways of communicating, addressing conflict, and connecting safely and meaningfully.

My core training is in psychodynamic therapy, which focuses on understanding your past and how it unconsciously shows up in your present-day, like the roles you assume, expectations you hold, and patterns you repeat. We'll focus on gaining insight and processing the unresolved feelings or thoughts that persist in your mind or body. I also use a parts-based approach (ego-state) that helps you grapple with difficult experiences and deep-seated beliefs so you can feel more integrated and whole.

My core training is psychodynamic therapy, which focuses on understanding how your past unconsciously shows up in your present-day—in the roles you assume, expectations you hold, and patterns you repeat. We'll work on gaining insight and processing the unresolved feelings or thoughts you store in your mind/body. We may use a parts-based psychodynamic approach like ego-state therapy to grapple with deep-seated negative beliefs, conflicts, and distress so you can feel more integrated and whole.

When someone is chronically abused, neglected, parentified, or shamed as a child, they may develop blueprints for connecting and communicating that make it difficult to form and maintain healthy relationships in adulthood. Anxiety, avoidance, fear, uncertainty and instability are common. My trauma-informed attachment-focused approach helps you gain insight on old blueprints, gently disrupt unhelpful patterns, build skills and tolerance for connection, and move toward healthier, safer connection.

I specialize in supporting neurodivergent folks, including autistic, AuDHD, ADHD, and bipolar folks. I'm neurodivergent myself, and many clients find it affirming to work with a therapist who truly "gets it". Together we can work on understanding and accepting your identity or a new diagnosis; gaining skills for specific autistic/AuDHD challenges like interpersonal or sensory issues; building self-esteem; and navigating relationships, conflict, and communication in a neurotypical world.

I specialize in attachment, or how the models for connection we learned early in life show up in our relationships today. Many of my clients experienced difficult childhoods: abuse, neglect, parentification, blame and shame. Many feel unstable or unsafe in relationships, struggle with communication and conflict, or feel anxious or avoidant of connection. Together let's gain insight on old patterns of relating, form healthier ones, and work toward better relationships with others AND yourself.

I specialize in affirming therapy for folks whose gender, sexual identity, or sexual or relationship practices fall outside the mainstream. (Mine do too!) Together we can face big questions about identity and desire, navigate relationships and communication, grapple with social/family/cultural pressures, and strengthen your resilience and coping skills in a frightening political climate, while striving toward authentic living and meaningful connection.

I specialize in affirming therapy for folks whose gender, sexual identity, or sexual or relationship practices fall outside the mainstream. (Mine do too!) Together we can face big questions about identity and desire, navigate relationships and communication, grapple with social/family/cultural pressures, and strengthen your resilience and coping skills in a frightening political climate, while striving toward authentic living and meaningful connection.

I specialize in attachment, or how the models for connection we learned early in life show up in our relationships today. Many of my clients experienced difficult childhoods: abuse, neglect, parentification, blame and shame. Many feel unstable or unsafe in relationships, struggle with communication and conflict, or feel anxious or avoidant of connection. Together let's gain insight on old patterns of relating, form healthier ones, and work toward better relationships with others AND yourself.