Jennifer Twilley LMFT

All families experience some kind of stress, but sometimes every tool we have in our toolkit just seems useless or makes things worse. Family therapy isn't about taking sides (don't check out just yet, parents) but about learning new ways to set boundaries and love each other through the inevitable stress of growing pains.

Sometimes Loss is sudden, other times it's a long goodbye. But in almost every instance, Grief is also the loss of a story: the Story of What Should Happen. Having parents, being married, having children, having a certain job, living a certain way... We have all made a Life Story, and thought Life would just go along with it. And then it doesn't. And it sucks. Grief looks different on everyone, and takes as long as it takes.

Sometimes Loss is sudden, other times it's a long goodbye. But in almost every instance, Grief is also the loss of a story: the Story of What Should Happen. Having parents, being married, having children, having a certain job, living a certain way... We have all made a Life Story, and thought Life would just go along with it. And then it doesn't. And it sucks. Grief looks different on everyone, and takes as long as it takes.

Sometimes Loss is sudden, other times it's a long goodbye. But in almost every instance, Grief is also the loss of a story: the Story of What Should Happen. Having parents, being married, having children, having a certain job, living a certain way... We have all made a Life Story, and thought Life would just go along with it. And then it doesn't. And it sucks.

Sometimes Loss is sudden, other times it's a long goodbye. But in almost every instance, Grief is also the loss of a story: the Story of What We Thought Would Happen. Creating a meaningful story can be scary and painful, but there is no timeline or "master scenario" that fits every loss. Your story can still be beautiful. The story is still important.

Sometimes answering the question of "who am I?" is a complicated one. When we feel absolutely worthless, it can also be tempting to answer that question in someone/something else: jobs, titles, money, even alcohol and drugs can temporarily numb our own shame and self-loathing. But it never lasts for long. It's time to discover the beautiful individual that you truly are; and it has nothing to do with your appearance, education, or net worth.

Sometimes Loss is sudden, other times it's a long goodbye. But in almost every instance, Grief is also the loss of a story: the Story of What We Thought Would Happen. Creating a meaningful story can be scary and painful, but there is no timeline or "master scenario" that fits every loss. Your story can still be beautiful. The story is still important.

Sometimes Loss is sudden, other times it's a long goodbye. But in almost every instance, Grief is also the loss of a story: the Story of What We Thought Would Happen. Creating a meaningful story can be scary and painful, but there is no timeline or "master scenario" that fits every loss. Your story can still be beautiful. The story is still important.

Sometimes answering the question of "who am I?" is a complicated one. When we feel absolutely worthless, it can also be tempting to answer that question in someone/something else: jobs, titles, money, even alcohol and drugs can temporarily numb our own shame and self-loathing. But it never lasts for long. It's time to discover the beautiful individual that you truly are; and it has nothing to do with your appearance, education, or net worth.

I use a combination of Structural Family Therapy and Emotion Focused Therapy to help families understand the dynamics of family conflict, stages of development, and boundary issues. Change is scary, and families change all the time! What marks a healthy family system is not the absence of stress and conflict, but how the system reacts to it. Having more tools in the Family Toolkit allows for each system to be able to address the stress more effectively and with empathy.

For both Pre-Marital and Couples Counseling, the Gottman Method as we as Emotion Focused Therapy create a beautiful combination. If you are currently engaged, learning about how your family deals with conflict and having difficult conversations early is important. Having a road-map; whether you're just getting started, or you've been "driving for a while" and are lost makes a huge difference. But feeling safe in the car is important, too.

There is no judgement. Ever. NO story is too scary to tell, and no one is ever too broken. Being a trauma survivor is no small thing, and telling the stories of what happened to us aren't just about "talking about it" but about realizing the strength that we have, despite what happened. When we name what happened, it takes away the power of it and allows for new stories to develop.