Heather Tolle (She/Her)

Very early in my professional career, I began meeting with couples whose relationships were in crisis, whether from infidelity, poor communication, frequent conflicts, sexual dysfunctions/dissatisfaction or other issues affecting their relationship satisfaction. I have helped many couples to avoid separation or divorce by helping them to better understand their relationship needs and better communicate those needs to their partner for a happier and healthier relationship.

Life is difficult, and sometimes things happen that we never expected. During difficult times, it is not uncommon to experience anxiety, depression, or changes in mood and behavior as a response to the event or change. I have worked with many individuals for many different changes they are struggling to adjust to, including job loss, a change in an important relationship, loss of their home, death of a loved one, just to name a few.

I have worked with individuals with varying severity of depression and have experienced depression for myself, which I feel gives me a better understand of what my clients may be experiencing. Although everyone is different and will experience things differently, I have worked with many adults experiencing depression by being a listening and non-judgmental ear in a safe space and worked with them to develop coping strategies that are unique to their symptoms and needs.

“It is the client who knows what hurts, what directions to go, what problems are crucial, what experiences have been deeply buried.” -Carl Rogers I believe that you are the expert on you and ultimately know what is best for you. Sometimes we lack clarity and insight and need help uncovering it. Oftentimes, this can be as simple as talking through it with someone who will ask you specific questions to provide an environment for you to explore your thoughts and feelings.

Oftentimes, people come to therapy due to a rather urgent issue. Although it is helpful to explore the past, there isn't always time to do so. Maybe you are facing a time-sensitive decision or you are struggling with urgent symptoms - that's where solution-focused therapy comes in. I often receive feedback from clients that they feel better after just one session and leave the first session with better insight and with a tool or solution to try.

When two separate individuals with their own thoughts and preferences come together, no matter how much we love one another, conflicts will arise. Often, these conflicts arise out of poor communication or miscommunication. We sometimes want and expect our partners to be mind readers and know what we want and need, but that's not reality. The reality is, we can only get our needs met by our partner if they know what that need is and direction on how to meet it.