If your anger or anxiety interferes with your relationships, career, or well-being, it is probably time to get some experienced help.
Clinical Psychologist in San Rafael, CA
Anger is a normal human emotion that warns us that something is being done to us that is threatening, unjust, or gets in the way of getting our needs met. Of course, we can become angry at ourselves for a variety of reasons. Anger by nature is not a “problem” nor does it always require “anger management.” Unfortunately, for many people, anger can become a problem that affects our mental and physical health, strains or damages relationships, hurts our ability to perform, and diminishes the way we see ourselves. I help people for whom anger has become a problem through developing behavioral and emotional self-awareness, understanding about triggers and underlying causes (including historical trauma), and effective coping skills (aka “tools”) that can help them manage their anger reactions in more constructive ways.
Some of my clients wish to go deeper than just problem solving, symptom reduction, and skill-building. Employing aspects of psychodynamic therapy, I help people notice and review emotions, thoughts, early-life experiences, and beliefs to gain insight into their lives and present-day problems and to evaluate the patterns they have developed over time. Recognizing recurring patterns can help people see how they avoid distress or develop defense mechanisms to cope so that they can take steps to change those patterns. I draw on several different psychodynamic styles in order to tailor my approach to bet fit and help each individual client.
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is grounded in the belief that it is a person’s perception of events—rather than the events themselves—that determines how he or she will feel and act. As a cognitive behavioral therapist, I believe that by adjusting our thoughts, we can directly influence our emotions and behavior. CBT involves much more than just sitting and talking about whatever comes to mind. This structured approach ensures that you and I are focused on the goals of each session, ensuring that the time spent in therapy is productive. The person in CBT therapy benefits from a collaborative relationship in which he or she is able to reveal personal issues without fear of judgment and is helped to understand the issues at hand without being told which choices he or she should make. CBT techniques incorporate many different therapeutic tools to help people evaluate their emotional patterns and states and make effective change.
As a man, you may be used to: Solving your own problems Not asking for help Avoiding talking with others about things that cause you stress and upset Believing that there is something “unmanly” about seeking and participating in counseling Again, you are not alone. There are numerous reasons that boys and men in our culture would choose to suffer in private silence than admit to another person that there is something they cannot fix on their own. In addition, it’s sometimes tough to go to your friends or family for support, or they are simply not helpful. And searching for solutions on the internet and in books has it’s limits (and can be confusing and frustrating, too). Now, you are still struggling and are thinking about seeking the help of someone like me: a men’s counselor. In our culture, there are expectations for men not to be “weak” or “vulnerable” and to hide emotions or be “warriors.” However, it’s a myth that talking about your problems and how you feel about them will somehow, magically, make you less of a man. Not true. Times are changing, and men need to learn critical skills like emotional intelligence, communication skills, stress management and relationship building. That’s where men’s counseling can help.
Racing pulse? Sweaty palms? Tight chest? Shortness of breath? Difficulty thinking clearly? Feeling “anxiety”? These are some of the most common signs of anxiety, a normal human emotional and physical state that serves to signal us that something important is going on. A little anxiety keeps us alert, such as when we are about to cross the street and our anxiety signals us to be cautious and check for traffic before stepping off the curb. A lot of anxiety can distract us, make us physically uncomfortable, steal our sleep, lead us to avoid important activities in life, and even increase our risk for stroke, heart attack, and other serious illness. I help clients decrease their suffering from excessive anxiety by working on several fronts: reducing uncomfortable symptoms by increasing coping and relaxation skills; examining and changing anxiety-provoking ways of thinking; and getting to the root causes of the anxiety in order to minimize recurrences and develop mastery over excessive anxiety.
Anger is a normal human emotion that warns us that something is being done to us that is threatening, unjust, or gets in the way of getting our needs met. Of course, we can become angry at ourselves for a variety of reasons. Anger by nature is not a “problem” nor does it always require “anger management.” Unfortunately, for many people, anger can become a problem . I help people for whom anger has become a problem through developing behavioral and emotional self-awareness, understanding about triggers and underlying causes, and effective coping skills (aka “tools”) that can help them manage their anger reactions in more constructive ways.