I know it's hard to connect when your social anxiety acts up. I help people from diverse communities find success in work and relationships.
Psychologist in New York, NY
I've been trained in a variety of CBTs, including Exposure Therapy, Behavioral Activation, Cognitive Therapy, and Dialectical Behavior Therapy, which have been found effective for anxiety disorders, procrastination and major depression, and Borderline Personality Disorder, respectively. I deliver these treatments either "stand alone," or integrated with a more comprehensive treatment package. Although homework is a major component of these treatments, I use a secure client portal my clients use to do their homework electronically. It can even be downloaded on your phone or tablet, so you can implement your treatment on the go.
I offer a short-term, evidence-based, and contemporary form of psychoanalysis called intensive psychodynamic therapy, which has been found effective in helping people improve their relationships, learn to cope with difficult feelings, and manage their anxiety. I also deliver it in short-term (12-20 sessions) and longer term (>1 year) forms. A benefit for some people is that compared to CBT, this form of treatment does not require formal homework. Homework, however, can be added as an adjunct, and in some cases leads to a more effective treatment.
I often say that while CBT and psychoanalysis are my preferred treatment orientations, Multicultural Competence is my orientation to treatment. Being multiculturally competent means shutting up and really listening when someone's experience of the world is different from yours because of differences in race, gender, class, culture, and sexuality. It also means not assuming that because you share a cultural identity, that this somehow erases the other person's individuality and personality. It means sitting in that tension between what makes us different, and what makes us all the same. For me, it also means owning to your mistakes, and understanding that while one's intent may not be malicious, it's the results of one's behavior that matters.
Dating in New York City, let alone Manhattan, is... hard, to put it mildly. You go on date after date, trying to find a genuine connection. Yet you find yourself repeating the same old patterns--in dating and in relationships. Still, it's hard to let go of the past and stay open to new people, without feeling the same old fears. In this city's dating culture, it's hard to figure out how to improve your dating life and nourish real relationships. I can help you find greater balance in your love life, by learning to discern between which relationships to spend time and energy on, and by addressing the patterns that keep you in relationships that aren't worth your time, or are unhealthy. That way, you can build a life that attracts someone who is a better fit for you.
Do you find yourself avoiding social situations, out of a fear that you'll embarrass yourself in some way? Do you worry excessively and have a constant fear of rejection? Does all of this lead you to miss out on opportunities and relationships because avoidance controls your life? Odds are, you're struggling with social anxiety. What we don’t realize, often, is that anxiety is biologically self-limiting. In other words, it can go down on its own. But if we keep avoiding things that make us anxious, we actually become more sensitive to anxiety, so that even things that didn’t bother us before start to get overwhelming. Anxiety starts to take over your life. So how can therapy with me help? I'll give you the tools to regulate your anxiety. I'll helps you approach the situations that make you anxious, challenge your worrisome thoughts about other people, and reduce your need to use avoidance to cope. That way, you can start to get out there and live your life again.
My academic work has focused on studying racial microaggressions and how people of color cope with them. Like any form of stress, microagressions put us in a state of "fight or flight," and when we get overwhelmed, we freeze. Being exposed to them repeatedly makes it hard to think, do your job, or even enjoy your relationships. Eventually, you find yourself either getting more irritable and confrontational, or more withdrawn and internalize your feelings. Without having some coping skills, you start to burn out. As somebody who not only studies this, but lives it, I know how frustrating and overwhelming it is to cope with microaggressions day to day. Using culturally-adapted, evidence-based tools for managing distress, I'll help you use your discernment to do what is needed in the moment--whether that's confronting someone skillfully, or practicing self-care to prevent burning out. Because while we're all in this struggle, we also deserve to pull back, and take care of ourselves.