Breakups aren’t easy- and deciding when to call it quits can be one of the most challenging parts.
Julie and Gina break down some of the most common issues clients face when approaching the topic, and how to overcome them in your relationships.
“The person you most want to process isn’t someone you can work through this with.”
“How can your relationship expand to fit the things we want?”
“You have to be really clear and you have to be really honest about what you’re really wanting. And that can be really scary if you have fear about the relationship ending.”
“You can’t always compromise on things.”
“Be really clear about what we want instead of undercutting what we want and then only getting part of what we want.”
“We only get one life and some of these big decisions are things we can only do one way or one time. So you have to be really clear about what you want.”
“Really look at the current iteration of the relationship instead of trying to change back into the way we were or some aspirational fantasy of how we could be.”
“If nothing changes is this the relationship you want to be in?”
“Can it change? For sure, but the trajectory of change isn’t linear…we take a few steps forward and then a fall back into an old pattern and that part can be really hard when you’re already exhausted or worn down. Do you have the patience and bandwidth for the work that it’s gonna take for change?”
“Do you have the energy to do this work? Not just your partner to change"
Julie’s Couples Reflection Questions:
Gina Senarighi, MS, MA, CPC is a sexuality counselor and communication consultant specializing in healthy boundaries, passionate relationships, jealousy, and infidelity. She supports non-traditional couples all over the world as a retreat leader and certified relationship coach.
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Julie Jeske, LPC is a sex and relationship counselor. She has a private practice where she helps clients increase intimacy, ignite passion and deepen their connection to themselves and others. Julie especially loves to help women discover who they are sexually. Through counseling, online classes, or in-person retreats; her clients learn how to talk about their sexual and relationship desires, and explore ways to make them a reality.
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