Our early interactions have shaped our perception of how safe the world is, how to signal for care and what caregivers can provide when you do. As adults, these attachment systems stay with us and shape how we explore and experience intimate partners, friendships, employers, etc. Gained secure attahment is often a goal from my clients, but I can also help us understand that within your attachment style (anxious-avoidant) you can reshape how you exist in relationships.
Both the human condition and what is meaningful to us exists through interdependence and interactions with others. You and I do not exist in an isolated space, and your work with me is a microcosm of what you're like with others. I look to evoke what is meaningful to you, assigning value to this, and integrating this so that you may be genuine and authentic in your life.
We've all got internal roles that help us navigate our needs, defenses, and systems. All inner parts of us have a valuable role, but the way this is expressed might be maladaptive. Your need to control, push, or avoid is the solution to resolving something deeper.
We cannot pathologize love. I will help you erase the concept of codependency and rebuild self-advocacy, boundaries, and communication. If fear of rejection is at your core to the point where you avoid or "cling", it can be re-evaluated and reshaped.
Anxiety can often be overlooked because on the outside folks with anxiety can seem functional. Healthy distress allows us to keep schedules, ambition, drive, and some energy regulation. At which point does your stress turn into distress? Shifting anxiety symptoms by bring awareness to body, brain, and cognition. Within this, there is a demand for radical acceptance.
Adult attachment injuries, no matter the time we've received them, can impact how were perceive the world as safe and trusting. Let's find patterns that no longer help you and replace them with patterns and skills that invite compassion and love for self and others.